Thursday, August 5, 2010

Common Wealth Games

Well...well..Well..here we are after a long long time....I really really have a great reason to go be sarcastic. Its an axcellent (like count dracula would say) topic to write about. So today I write about the Amazing Common Wealth Games (henceforth referred to as ACWG). I will illustrate will examples on how out great netas and people involved in ACWG have interpreted the term"Common Wealth" literally


Illustration1:

Neta 1(eating cashew samosas and drinking high tea in the Marriot and rubbing his portly stomach): "Bhaisaab, aaj kal mehengaai ka zamaana bahut badh gaya hain, ghar mein sirf olive oil use kar rahe hai, 'extra virgin' ka toh poocho mat."

Neta 2 (more portly and rounder than his counterpart): "Haanji Bhaisaab, mein apni biwi ko apne chauthi meeting ki 10th anniversary pe kuch nahin khareed paya.Sirf ek aath dimond bracelet and ek Italy ka trip. Bahut gussa hui thi woh mujhpe, kya kare?"

Neta 1: "Arre, mein bhi yeh soch raha tha ki suddenly yaad aaya. Common Wealth Games, arre yaar, jab iska naam hi common wealth likha hai, toh hamaara hi hoga na..hum hi to "common man" hain, "Aam aadmi". Jab bhagavaan deta hai toh chappad phaad ke deta hai"

Neta 2 (Completely happy and contended at the idea):"Bhaisaab, isiliye toh mein appke party mein kaam karta hoon, kya intelligence hain"



Illustration 2:

Page 3 person airhead (dripping with jewellery and sipping an expensive champagne and looking depressed):"Dahlins', I cannot come to the F1 party in Monaco this year. We are cutting down expenses. My husband at the sports authority in Delhi says he cant afford the usual 12 holidays this year."

Page 3 person senior airhead (Equally dripping with diamonds but puzzled at the airhead's declaration):"But sweetums..is'nt he on the common wealth games construction committee?"

Page 3 person airhead:"Yes. He is..So..?"

Page 3 person senior airhead: "So, my dahlin', he can take you for 24 trips next year, not 12.., Its "common wealth" after all. This is the perfect time ot make money. God wants him to."

Page 3 person airhead (All happy and in tears):"Oh! Diddy poo..what would I do without you! i will walk to the temple at the end of my road barefoot today."



Illustration 3:

Discussion between two research officers in a reputed space development centre in the US of A

Researcher 1: "How can you look so relaxed?, We have no grants for our research project and our jobs are in serious trouble if we dont find some sponsor"
Researcher 2: "Hey, relax, I have a sponsor in mind. Government of India, Sports Authority"
Researcher 1: "Government of India????? What? How? Do they know??"
Researcher 2: "No, not yet, but should not be difficult. remember that we developed that treadmill which can be used in space and is anti-gravity, ABS and central locking with airbags?"
Researcher 1: "Yeah.Of course. They were so expensive to make. But what does that have to do with India and the Sports Authority?"
Researcher 2: "Elementary, my dear Watson, we are going to sell them to India for their commonwealth Games and make money."
Researcher 1: "Is'nt it better they get normal treadmills??? Why would they want ours.?"
Researcher 2: "because its Commonwealth games and they have the money to spend. Since its common wealth, we should also get some, should'nt we?"
Researcher 1(Looking relieved): "That's great. Phew. I feel better now. lets go have a beer. Its on me."



This is just a few illustrations which detail how our great netas have misinterpreted the meaning of "Commonwealth Games"..Some more to follow

7 comments:

Shruthi said...

bwahahhahahhahahah soooofer this is.
olle "come on, become wealthy" games aagbiTTide :D
good one I say..
btw welcome back bebbie ;)

Maanasi said...

@Shruthi..hehehhehe..Nice no..they seem to have interpreted it literally..hahahahah....i like your tag.."come on..be wealthy itseems"..heheh..And thanks bebbie..good to be back:)

smiley said...

Hahaha.. next one should be on the readiness of the stadia.. apparently UK is more ready for 2012 than we are to host this year.

Maanasi said...

@Smiley, I think UK should host it. it'll save us a lot in embarrassment money

Anonymous said...

UK should not host it...India should.Though India is full of poor people(netas-exp1), I am sure they'll come up with some or the other idea to avoid the embarrassment. i tell you, Indian politicians are cunning,witty, and brainy.. ;)

Sudheendra Hebbar said...

I was reading some news about 'Common Wealth Games' and accidently through some link got to read your blog regarding this. Really very good and impressive illustrations. A new meaning for 'Common Wealth Games'. Becoming wealthy from the money of Common man(after all its all our tax money) in the name of games.

Last year, I was in Switzerland during the Common Wealth Games. It was embrassing to see 'Common Wealth Games in India' hitting the headlines of BBC and CNN every day. I do remember a question asked by my Swiss Collegue on a coffee table. How India is still able to manage being economically strong irrespective of lot of corruption? I had no answer for his question being an Indian. Your illustratives are close to reality. This is what people in west think about India.

Being responsible citizens, We are not ready to change. so thing we can do is cursing our leaders. Unless until we dont change the electoral system will remain same and the result is more and more corrupted netas with portly stomaches. Social media should play a role in bringing more and more awareness among people. They should educate people agains such corruptions. But the social media is biased and the drama shown on the news channels is no more different from my wife's favorite daily serials.

The Corruption had penerated so deep in our system and the Scam of Common Wealth Games is just one example of it. Its been a year and still no clue about the missing millions of dollars spent in the name of Common Wealth Games. People forgot about the it and i guess the responsible netas will soon be out of the scam. When we are running out the news, then some more unearthed scam will hit the headlines and this will go on and on.

Dev said...

Nice article - I love the sarcasm :-)